LIGHT BULBS DON'T BOUNCE

Our trip south has thus far been interesting, if not filled with excitement.

Leaving for the winter to travel to Florida involves packing for both cool and possibly cold weather while also considering what we will need for the warmer Florida weather. Since we were already experiencing cold weather in New York, we had to have at least clothes that were appropriate departure day. We were traveling to our daughter’s home in Maryland and hoped it would be warmer there, which it was. Nevertheless, a storm was moving in across the Midwest, so who knew what type of clothing we would need in the next day or so. It’s always an adventure trying to second-guess Mother Nature, and we often end up with too many of one type of clothes and too few of the other.

Traveling in a car as we do these days is far less adventure filled than when we made similar trips in the Chuckwagon, as we called our now sold motor home. Although we can, and do, share the driving, I drove the entire trip this time. We made the 375-mile trip in just about eight hours. The road conditions were good and traffic was light … until.

We were traveling along happy has piglets snuggled against their mother’s warm belly while sucking on their favorite teat when we met with the first adventure of the trip. We were on a curve leaving Route I-83 to get around Harrisburg, PA when traffic came to stop. A complete stop! Ahead we saw nothing but cars, trucks and other vehicles nestled bumper to bumper like dogs greeting each other by sniffing butts. I happened to glance at the GPS on the dash and noticed that it was almost 8 miles to the next turn-off. That is how I knew later that it took us one hour and 18 minutes to travel those 8 miles. The backup, we learned, was caused by compressing three lanes of traffic into one lane, while side traffic entered the mix at several points, and all this for a work area of less than 200 yards long. Once past that roadwork bottleneck, we resumed normal speed and traveled to our Thanksgiving destination without further incident.

I have often wondered why after a long trip such as this that the first thing I want to do to sit down somewhere. Isn’t that strange. Anyway, our daughter was not yet home from her job, but we knew the Open Sesame that would raise the garage door, and we got in all right. Only one dog greeted us, which was a puzzle. We found the second one, Butch, mysteriously behind a closed door in our granddaughter’s room. Mysteriously, because both dogs are always free to roam the house during the day. I guess the adage “Snooze and you lose” applies in this case. Butch must have been snoozing in the bedroom when our granddaughter left for the day and became a captive of his laziness.

Our daughter returned home after work and that is when we learned our rest break was over. She had a list of “things” for us to do in preparation for the crowd that was due for Thanksgiving. Mom was to clean and vacuum and I had the responsibility of installing a new set of lights in the upstairs bathroom. Piece of cake, I figured.

Murphy’s Law says something to the effect that if anything can go wrong, it will. That bit of wisdom certainly applies with respect to home repairs. Each of the two light fixtures had three large, clear light bulbs in them. These had to come out so I could get to the escutcheons that held the light bar cover to the mounting plate. You know how light bulbs come out. You turn one a little and its feels really loose, but not loose enough to be removed. So you turn it some more and try again. I did this several times until I was sure it was loose enough to come out. But no. So I let go of the bulb to reposition my hand for another turn and, you got it, it WAS loose enough to come out. And it did.

Well, I’m leaning over the sink to get to the light bar that is mounted above the mirror and I am not in a good position to act quickly, so I thought I could – now get ready for this – catch it on the first bounce. Ha! In the same nano-second that I realized that light bulbs do not bounce, it did not bounce. It hit the sink below my arms shattered into 11 million tiny pieces. This is not a good thing to have happen where people frequently walk around bare footed.

OK, so Joyce had one more room to vacuum.

I was more cautious with the remaining bulbs and after replacing that first light fixture prepared to tackle the second one.

The cover plate on the second light fixture, I found, much to my consternation, covered not only the mounting plate but also two holes in the wall from an earlier fixture replacement. This was not part of the plan. While I carry numerous tools in my toolbox, spackling compound is not one of those tools. Nor do I carry a variety of paints with which to touch up holes once patched. Fortunately, my daughter had both spackling and touch-up paint and with great relief I announced shortly thereafter that the bathroom was finished.

Working on overhead projects that require me to look up for any length of time triggers my vertigo. This job was one of those projects and I found that I was dizzy and lightheaded the rest of the day. Not the way I wanted to start the Thanksgiving holiday season, but I survived and was ready for the big turkey massacre the next day.

I hope you had a happy Thanksgiving with friends and/or family. We did. We had 14 people that included two of my daughters and their families, sans one grandson, and my cousin and his wife. It’s good to have family around.